Live it Like You Mean it

 
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Live it like

you Mean it

 

I have always had conflicted feelings about Christmas.  I love the traditions, the music, the joyous feeling of it all, and personally I think Christmas decorations can make a home look both cozy and amazing.  Personally I love the lights and can go a little overboard when setting up the tree. More than once I have melted extension cords, but that is a story for another time. I don't love Christmas for the winter scenery, hot cocoa and scarfs.  That has never been my experience. Nothing clashes with the idea of a snowy and white Christmas more than beachy sweaty days and champagne in the sun.  But hey!  I will take warm over cold weather any day. So, while snow is great, its such a privilege to be in a place that is warm for the holidays. If you think about it, a lot of places in the world right now either have summer weather or are in the middle of summer.  From the place where i grew up-Veracruz, or Miami where I live now, to places in South America or Australia, so I am not alone experiencing a sunny and warm Christmas.

However, the real reason why I loved Christmas is because it is a time when I get a chance to be with people that I care about and that always made me feel safe and loved. I love Christmas, and yet, many years of my adult life, I have struggled spending it far away from some of my dearest and favorite people in the world:  My sisters and my Mom. I love them and love being with them; and yet for many years my body was with them but I was never present. 

I have had jobs that meant hours and hours of working to no end, just to finish absolutely exhausted or thinking on what was left to do in the office when I was with the people I love.  Today I know that what people remember of you is not what a great negotiator you were but the moments you spent together and how you made them feel.  When I opened my consulting business I promised to try and really be present with the people I care about (not in the phone or surfing the internet, but there, with them). And, I have to say, it’s the best decision I have made. So now I try and do that-spend as much time as I can with the people that I like and I care about.  And really be there with them.

 Last year my sisters and I took my Mother on this trip to France and Spain.  I organized most of it and I recognize that I just wanted them to have such a great time that I ended up over booking everyone big time. They hated it at first, but we had fun.  We drank, we talked, we fixed the world. we were back to who we have always been growing up.  My sisters, my Mom and I.  Together.  It was brilliant and beautiful. And yes, we also annoyed each other a little at times but even with then it was always LOVE all around.  We were in this trip together and we loved it. It was our own extra special celebration of being together.  It was like a whole 9 days full of Christmas days, one after another. This year they are all back in Mexico and I wont be able to join them.  We try to be together as much as possible but life happens and sometimes is just not possible, so that trip was a privilege to experience and I will always cherish it. I also get to spend the holiday with Alex and dear friends.  So Im very happy about that.

In the last month something that I wasn’t expecting happened, not once but twice.  It really shook something in me.  It made me had this ultra appreciation on life and the people I love. I lost, so suddenly,  two people that were indirectly very close to my life.  One is the sister of one of my best friends.  I have not seen her in years but I felt like she was always present.  The other one was the previous owner of my house. The house I love. We always had a great relationship with him and I kept discovering little reminders of him and his partner around the house as we lived and renovated it. Both of them found that they had cancer and in less than a month, sadly they died. They both were very loved by everyone around them and it was very hard to see them go so young and so suddenly. They were great people and by the reaction of everyone around them, they touched and made a difference in many lives. Life can be so fragile and so short and yet we all say good bye as if we were all inmortal.

 My grandfather used to say that the only thing you need to die is to be alive.  I didn’t quite fully understood it when I was younger  but its so true.  And now it makes so much sense. It is a privilege to live and I think that we should not waste our lives.  If you don't like something, change it.  You never know how much time you have. It might not be much though. I hope that this Christmas you are lucky enough to be with the people that love you and make you feel safe.  I hope that you are present and enjoy them fully. Give them big hugs every time you can. They can blame the effusiveness on the holidays. Or the cocktails. who cares.  I know this: everyone appreciates a warm hug. And in the holidays they feel even better

I hope that everyday of your life, you live like you mean it.  Because you never know when this crazy ride can be over.  And if you are lucky enough to be with the people you love for the holidays.  Put down the phone. Truly be present and enjoy them.

Happy holidays to everyone close and far away.

 From the beach and with love,

 Rubén

 

 

 

 

 
Rubén MendiolaComment